2 Things Not to Lose During a Pandemic

In the midst of this pandemic, you may be worried about losing retirement savings, or losing your health, or losing your job, or any number of absolutely relevant fears. If you are worried about any of those things, congratulations, you are human!

In our privileged normal life, basic human needs (shelter, food, clothing, health) typically escape to the back of our minds, replaced by higher level needs of relationships, search for enjoyment, and new self-discoveries and improvements. Until, usually suddenly, basic human needs come flying to the forefront of our mind when they are at risk of being lost.

In 1943, struck by the urgency of a world in turmoil (with World War II ongoing), American Psychologist Abraham Maslow categorized human needs into five levels. The levels can be summarized to three tiers:

• At the Base: understanding how to survive
• In the Middle: understanding how we relate to the world
• At the Top: understanding ourselves

In the chaos, we are forced to return to the base. To rebuild.

However, we must remember a few things from our time at the top. If we can hold on to what we have learned when things were calmer, we can reduce the impact of chaos.

I am referring to two needs that are higher in the hierarchy, but can’t be ignored while our focus is brought lower. The two things that are at stake during this pandemic are a loss of peace and a loss of relationships.

Loss of Peace

Peace is one of those words that is so overused, we tend to think of it as momentary, flighty, and surface level. However, that is not the peace I am referring to. I am referring to a peace discovered at the top of the hierarchy of needs. True peace is an emotional and mental response to a firm and foundational sense of self. It comes from knowing who you are.

Peace, in this sense, is not dependent on circumstances. It is confident in your worth as a person, independent of any other sources of worth and significance – such as a job, a nice place to live, strong retirement plans, and so on. Because it is independent, it is not reactive to the idea of losing those other sources of worth. True peace is a foundation and sense of purpose that is not shaken by even extreme external factors.

Holding on to this peace, in the midst of chaos, requires consistent reflection. While other more pressing thoughts and fears may be at the forefront of your mind, this inner peace will help you see that the chaos is not all there is.

Loss of Relationships

Relationships are particularly difficult to hold on to when distance is a requirement. When the traditional methods of communication (face-to-face/socially) are no longer an option, the level of effort increases. Think about all the college friends you said you’d stay in touch with. It was much easier when you lived in the same dorm. Now, the only relationships that are maintained are those where consistent effort has been given.

Relationships have always been effortful. Much like some of my house plants in the past that have been neglected, without nurturing, they will fade. Now, more than ever, is the time to think about which relationships are important to you. If they are important, find creative ways to keep them going.

In the end, relationships are often the key to progress. They can help you get that next job. They can keep you mentally stable during isolation. It’s much harder to get lost when someone is with you.